6:01AM Wake up so early coffee is the only way to possibly keep your eyes open. They need to be particularly perky for the pictures later.
7:05AM Run around frantically making sure you have everything you need for forever before you dash out the door (makeup, dress, clutch, heels, gift, card, phone, keys, cash, umbrella, kitchen sink, and sanity).
7:20AM Sit in car for 10 minutes waiting for other bridesmaids to meet you at hotel, because clearly you overestimated the busyness of traffic at 7AM on a Saturday morning...
7:46AM Fellow bridesmaid shares how her fiance was questioning why she had to get up so early just to get ready for a wedding... you all laugh!
8:15AM Arrive at the parent's of the bride's home with fellow bridesmaids, come bearing coffee for all.
8:20AM Wander around aimlessly until someone gives you directions on what you should be doing.
8:21AM Makeup! Putting makeup on your face is a good idea, do that. Ensure that it is more bold than usual, but not so out there that it would take any attention off of the bride. Note: Mascara must be waterproof.
8:45AM Time to kill? Take pictures, lots of pictures. Getting ready and decoration pictures.
9:02AM Eat breakfast, nutrition is important. Stay hydrated and well nourished throughout the day. Nobody wants a fainting bridesmaid. Once again distracting attention from the bride is a big no-no so eat those eggs and drink that orange juice!
9:15AM More time to kill? Time for some Facebook and Instagram. Social media: the biggest time waster of all...and essential to tell the world exactly what you are doing at this very moment.
9:37AM Pose as photographer takes some fun pictures of you girls pretending to do hair and makeup together. You grab the curling iron and pretend to curl your hair, but your hair is a straight as a board. Nobody is going to believe that acting...should have thought that through.
9:50AM Hair is next! For real this time! Show pictures to the stylist so she knows what you want. Be prepared for it to look nothing like the picture, however it will still be beautiful, just keep smiling! But don't smile too much while she hairspray's your hair until it can't possibly move anymore because you don't want it to get in your teeth.
10:45AM Time to get dressed! Put on your dress, and please don't smush your hair in the process. And make sure you have everyone check out your bum in the sun to make sure you can't see your unmentionables underneath, nothing shall take attention of the bride this day! (Side note: how can two layers of fabric still be somewhat sheer?!)
11:00AM Smile pretty as the photographer takes some nice pictures of you and fellow bridesmaids. Show off your pearly whites! You need to practice for later right? But first let me take a selfie!
11:15AM The Bride is getting dressed and having portraits done so now you wait... they don't let you see her yet and it's torturous. Why? Because you're her bridesmaids!
11:52AM Crunch time, the wedding is in just over an hour, up until now time has crawled like a sloth stuck in glue, but now switches to a hummingbird on redbull. Press panic button now.
11:57AM It's time for the bridesmaids first look with your dear Bride. Head upstairs, but stop just before the top. Close eyes and let the photographer position you into the doorway for a photo. No peeking! So excited you can feel the emotion welling. She counts and gives the word and you open your eyes. Your Bride is absolutely stunning! At first you're just smiling, but then the tears well. Keep it together...fine, just a few happy tears. Your dear friend is getting married and you are just so ecstatic for her you can't help it.
11:59AM Hug Bride gently, do not get tears on the dress, do not smudge makeup, there is no time for touch ups.
12:05PM Photographer takes a few posed shots of the girls with tea cups and saucers, feels so classy and elegant!
12:12PM Time to go!! Once again, frantically run around making sure you have everything needed and jam it all into the car, hope you didn't forget anything.
12:25PM Blast the 'Watch Me Nae Nae' song in the car and dance like there's no tomorrow. Pull up beside the Bride's car and take pictures of her making faces. Pretty sure that scared look is fake right?
12:39PM Pull into the parking lot at the park early. Pick jaw up off ground. Are bridal party's ever this early!? Bop to the Nae Nae song some more. Take selfie with Bride.
12:43PM Secure Kleenex in bouquet...just in case.
12:50PM Time to make way over to ceremony site. Walk carefully as heels and grass don't always get along. Bridesmaids in position create shield around Bride so she can't be seen by meandering or late guests. Cross fingers that doggy in the park isn't too friendly.
12:58PM Hide behind the bushes from ceremony site. Can see guest and hear the music faintly. Nerves and excitement rise.
12:59PM Take time for prayer. Pray over the bride, the day, and the marriage. Uber important. Keep tears at bay, not the time, you only have one Kleenex.
1:00PM It's starting!
1:02PM Bridesmaid's cue to walk. Wait, a leaf! Is it too late to stop? All that time waiting and your fellow bridesmaid has a bright yellow leaf stuck around her heel. It's too late. You walk across a little footbridge and across the grass to where the guests are seated. Having practiced this numerous times at the rehearsal you rock it. The little Pacman group gingerly yet elegantly makes your way across the green doing your best not to aerate it too much as you go.
1:03PM Walk down aisle. Smile. Not too much, make pace with bridesmaid ahead, not too fast, not too slow, cheeks are quivering, this feels unnatural. Hold bouquet just right. Make eye contact with someone, don't sink into the grass, eye contact with Mother of the Bride, yes, happy natural smile :) Take place at front. Nailed it!
1:04PM The Bride and her father step out and walk towards the ceremony site. So happy, so beautiful, so perfect. Eyes well once again, but smiling comes easy.
1:10PM Sing hymns without the words: "Wa-ter-mel-on, waaa-ter-melon". Air band practice in grade five has now paid off.
1:21PM Feel something on leg. Do. Not. Panic. Keep calm. Casually look down and brush it off. It wasn't a spider so you're okay. Quickly scratch the itch and ignore it.
1:28PM They are pronounced Husband & Wife! Yay! Everyone claps and cheers! What a beautiful ceremony, and you didn't even need the Kleenex!
1:30PM Walk over to picture site with bridal party. Heart swells watching the Bride and Groom walking together hand in hand ahead. Such love <3
1:35PM Two other bridal parties are in the same location for photos. Dual it out? You could take them! Photographer opts for side spot on bridge. Still beautiful. Wait while family gets photos taken.
1:50PM Ringbearer from other party starts to cry. Not gonna lie, a Scottish kilt on the little guy is pretty adorable.
1:56PM Watch other parties take photos. Not judging, but your Bride is prettier, your colours, and dresses are nicer, and your party looks out for others. Fellow bridesmaid goes to tell neighbor bride that there is a tree branch stuck in the tulle of her dress. Bias to the max :)
2:13PM Mother of the Bride and Maid of Honour come bolting across the bridge, cruise past and take their stance on the 'photo spot' when the other party is finished.
2:20PM Your Bridal Party takes places and photographer snaps a few photos. Smile, look into the distance, look at Bride, be natural, have fun, but don't squint too much from the sun!
2:30PM Time to drive to second location for more bridal party photos. Fellow Bridesmaid has so generously brought protein bars for snacks, but they are almost liquid from the heat in the car. So hungry, so yummy, eat very carefully and do not, I repeat, do not get chocolate on dress!!
3:00PM Bridal party photo fun time! Do as told: stand here, walk there, look over, make silly face, hold the veil, pretend that, help with bride's dress, smile pretty, look serious, pray that your face actually looks like you think it does in your head!
3:47PM Feet tired. Succumb to temptation and remove shoes. Grass feels nice. Note, do not step on ant hill. Sit down and eat some snacks, thank the Groomsmen for bringing food!
3:58PM Someone comes running and says there is a tow truck. Fellow Bridesmaid and Groomsman go running to move the vehicles. Cheer them on while you continue to relax on the lawn. Turns out tow truck is just chilling out. No need to panic.
4:10PM Watch Bride have pictures taken. She is extra beautiful, must be the 'newlywed glow' :) Snap a few of own photos.
4:30PM Stay hydrated! Fellow Bridesmaid, voluntells groomsmen to bring Starbucks. He takes orders and you ask for a PSL Frapp, it's code he doesn't understand. They bring the drinks and all are happy. Yay!
5:00PM Bridal party is released from photo fun time. Time to head to cocktail hour at the hotel.
5:30PM Arrive at hotel and take time in washroom to freshen up. Panic because deodorant is missing. Resign to the fact that you may be a smelly bridesmaid. Decide to touch up makeup, open makeup case and there is deodorant! Confirm to self, sometimes you're too smart for your own good...
5:40PM Mix and mingle at cocktail hour, eat some yummy food, take photos of the deorations, and catch up with friends.
6:25PM Bride and Groom arrive and bridal party gets ready for fabulous entrance.
6:30PM Bride and Groom announced into reception for the first time as Mr. & Mrs. :) Happy Happy Day!
6:35PM MC introduces bridal party. Stand briefly and do the queen wave casually when announced, smile and sit, the show is not about you after all.
6:45PM The head table is served dinner. Eat gracefully, you never know who is watching! Fellow Bridesmaid casually puts spoon on nose. Take picture.
7:48PM Dessert is ready, but the chocolate mousse cake has run out. Linger awkwardly at dessert table with fellow bridesmaid until more is brought out. Take big piece. (To quote Lord of the Rings: "My precious!!")
8:30PM Program begins, MC starts with game for bridal party. Group version of the shoe game. You are given coloured signs and are required to show the pink side (for Bride) or blue side (for Groom) in response to each question. "Who proposed?" pfft that's a no brainer. Blue. "Who farted first?" Easy haha. Pink. "Who would eat the other first in a zombie apocalypse" What?! Lol we have to to answer that!? ....cautiously raise sign...Pink? Look at what other's in the party said, majority is pink. Yup that's your Bride. Everyone laughs, what a fun game :)
8:42PM Beautiful toasts are given by the Maid of Honour and Best Man, plus speeches by the Parents of the Bride and Groom. Just enough laughs, not really any tears, but just sentimental enough. Clink glasses with fellow bridesmaids, To the Bride! Yum, this punch is delicious!! Bride and Groom conclude with their thank you's. What a lovely couple!
9:34PM Bride and Groom cut the cake. Snap lots of photos. They feed cake to eachother, Uh oh! Some cake goes down bride's dress! Bridesmaid duty to run to her rescue? Nope that's the Groom's job now and he's mighty thrilled too ;)
9:42PM Bride and Groom's first dance, so much love.
9:58PM The dance begins! Music is so loud can't hear self think. The strobe lights are so bright and flashy can't see straight. The DJ starts the smog machine...cough, cough, hack. But all of it's okay because at this point one doesn't need to think, see, or breath right?! Dance, dance, dance, and Watch Me Nae Nae!
10:36PM Come and go from dance, yell chat some more with friends above the volume of the music, sit at head table and observe others dance. Fun day, but long day. Have Diet Pepsi for caffeine boost, eeew why is diet Pepsi fountain pop so yucky!
10:43PM Join dance again, dance circle forms...ugh you strongly dislike dance circles. No one goes in center of circle and so man with tie on his head starts pulling people into center one at a time. Eeep! He's going in order around the circle. Leave dance circle before he gets to you. Awkward, potentially embarrassing crisis averted. Phew!
11:10PM Bridesmaids want to Nae Nae again, go over to DJ to request song. Tell DJ song name, he can't hear, say it louder, he still can't hear, yell the song name at the DJ, he says they don't have it. Tell him they already played it once and it was too short. He nods.
11:13PM The next song is the Nae Nae song. You dance your hearts out with your Bride and it is awesome.
11:16PM The DJ plays the Nae Nae again. You keep dancing.
11:19PM The Nae Nae is still playing. The Bride is having a good time and gets Groom to join in. He actually does the 'stanky leg'!
11:22PM Time feels like an eternity now. Is it possible to still be dancing the Nae Nae?
11:25PM The Nae Nae is over and the dance proceeds. You don't think you ever want to Nae Nae again. Why do you keep having to say Nae Nae, you don't even know what it means!
11:48PM Bride and Groom are getting ready to leave. There is no official send off so Bridesmaids form an arch together and cheer them off into their happily ever after.
12:37AM Dance is petering out and so is this Bridesmaid. Duty calls to stay to the end.
1:00AM DJ pulls the plug and the reception is officially over. The mint cleanup crew is up and going, gotta get everything packed up.
1:47AM Dreamland is calling, crawl into bed, another dear friend married off, smile to self, a splendid and successful day for sure.
1:48AM Zzzzzzzz
7:05AM Run around frantically making sure you have everything you need for forever before you dash out the door (makeup, dress, clutch, heels, gift, card, phone, keys, cash, umbrella, kitchen sink, and sanity).
7:20AM Sit in car for 10 minutes waiting for other bridesmaids to meet you at hotel, because clearly you overestimated the busyness of traffic at 7AM on a Saturday morning...
7:46AM Fellow bridesmaid shares how her fiance was questioning why she had to get up so early just to get ready for a wedding... you all laugh!
8:15AM Arrive at the parent's of the bride's home with fellow bridesmaids, come bearing coffee for all.
8:20AM Wander around aimlessly until someone gives you directions on what you should be doing.
8:21AM Makeup! Putting makeup on your face is a good idea, do that. Ensure that it is more bold than usual, but not so out there that it would take any attention off of the bride. Note: Mascara must be waterproof.
8:45AM Time to kill? Take pictures, lots of pictures. Getting ready and decoration pictures.
9:02AM Eat breakfast, nutrition is important. Stay hydrated and well nourished throughout the day. Nobody wants a fainting bridesmaid. Once again distracting attention from the bride is a big no-no so eat those eggs and drink that orange juice!
9:15AM More time to kill? Time for some Facebook and Instagram. Social media: the biggest time waster of all...and essential to tell the world exactly what you are doing at this very moment.
9:37AM Pose as photographer takes some fun pictures of you girls pretending to do hair and makeup together. You grab the curling iron and pretend to curl your hair, but your hair is a straight as a board. Nobody is going to believe that acting...should have thought that through.
9:50AM Hair is next! For real this time! Show pictures to the stylist so she knows what you want. Be prepared for it to look nothing like the picture, however it will still be beautiful, just keep smiling! But don't smile too much while she hairspray's your hair until it can't possibly move anymore because you don't want it to get in your teeth.
10:45AM Time to get dressed! Put on your dress, and please don't smush your hair in the process. And make sure you have everyone check out your bum in the sun to make sure you can't see your unmentionables underneath, nothing shall take attention of the bride this day! (Side note: how can two layers of fabric still be somewhat sheer?!)
11:00AM Smile pretty as the photographer takes some nice pictures of you and fellow bridesmaids. Show off your pearly whites! You need to practice for later right? But first let me take a selfie!
11:15AM The Bride is getting dressed and having portraits done so now you wait... they don't let you see her yet and it's torturous. Why? Because you're her bridesmaids!
11:52AM Crunch time, the wedding is in just over an hour, up until now time has crawled like a sloth stuck in glue, but now switches to a hummingbird on redbull. Press panic button now.
11:57AM It's time for the bridesmaids first look with your dear Bride. Head upstairs, but stop just before the top. Close eyes and let the photographer position you into the doorway for a photo. No peeking! So excited you can feel the emotion welling. She counts and gives the word and you open your eyes. Your Bride is absolutely stunning! At first you're just smiling, but then the tears well. Keep it together...fine, just a few happy tears. Your dear friend is getting married and you are just so ecstatic for her you can't help it.
11:59AM Hug Bride gently, do not get tears on the dress, do not smudge makeup, there is no time for touch ups.
12:05PM Photographer takes a few posed shots of the girls with tea cups and saucers, feels so classy and elegant!
12:12PM Time to go!! Once again, frantically run around making sure you have everything needed and jam it all into the car, hope you didn't forget anything.
12:25PM Blast the 'Watch Me Nae Nae' song in the car and dance like there's no tomorrow. Pull up beside the Bride's car and take pictures of her making faces. Pretty sure that scared look is fake right?
12:39PM Pull into the parking lot at the park early. Pick jaw up off ground. Are bridal party's ever this early!? Bop to the Nae Nae song some more. Take selfie with Bride.
12:43PM Secure Kleenex in bouquet...just in case.
12:50PM Time to make way over to ceremony site. Walk carefully as heels and grass don't always get along. Bridesmaids in position create shield around Bride so she can't be seen by meandering or late guests. Cross fingers that doggy in the park isn't too friendly.
12:58PM Hide behind the bushes from ceremony site. Can see guest and hear the music faintly. Nerves and excitement rise.
12:59PM Take time for prayer. Pray over the bride, the day, and the marriage. Uber important. Keep tears at bay, not the time, you only have one Kleenex.
1:00PM It's starting!
1:02PM Bridesmaid's cue to walk. Wait, a leaf! Is it too late to stop? All that time waiting and your fellow bridesmaid has a bright yellow leaf stuck around her heel. It's too late. You walk across a little footbridge and across the grass to where the guests are seated. Having practiced this numerous times at the rehearsal you rock it. The little Pacman group gingerly yet elegantly makes your way across the green doing your best not to aerate it too much as you go.
1:03PM Walk down aisle. Smile. Not too much, make pace with bridesmaid ahead, not too fast, not too slow, cheeks are quivering, this feels unnatural. Hold bouquet just right. Make eye contact with someone, don't sink into the grass, eye contact with Mother of the Bride, yes, happy natural smile :) Take place at front. Nailed it!
1:04PM The Bride and her father step out and walk towards the ceremony site. So happy, so beautiful, so perfect. Eyes well once again, but smiling comes easy.
1:10PM Sing hymns without the words: "Wa-ter-mel-on, waaa-ter-melon". Air band practice in grade five has now paid off.
1:21PM Feel something on leg. Do. Not. Panic. Keep calm. Casually look down and brush it off. It wasn't a spider so you're okay. Quickly scratch the itch and ignore it.
1:28PM They are pronounced Husband & Wife! Yay! Everyone claps and cheers! What a beautiful ceremony, and you didn't even need the Kleenex!
1:30PM Walk over to picture site with bridal party. Heart swells watching the Bride and Groom walking together hand in hand ahead. Such love <3
1:35PM Two other bridal parties are in the same location for photos. Dual it out? You could take them! Photographer opts for side spot on bridge. Still beautiful. Wait while family gets photos taken.
1:50PM Ringbearer from other party starts to cry. Not gonna lie, a Scottish kilt on the little guy is pretty adorable.
1:56PM Watch other parties take photos. Not judging, but your Bride is prettier, your colours, and dresses are nicer, and your party looks out for others. Fellow bridesmaid goes to tell neighbor bride that there is a tree branch stuck in the tulle of her dress. Bias to the max :)
2:13PM Mother of the Bride and Maid of Honour come bolting across the bridge, cruise past and take their stance on the 'photo spot' when the other party is finished.
2:20PM Your Bridal Party takes places and photographer snaps a few photos. Smile, look into the distance, look at Bride, be natural, have fun, but don't squint too much from the sun!
2:30PM Time to drive to second location for more bridal party photos. Fellow Bridesmaid has so generously brought protein bars for snacks, but they are almost liquid from the heat in the car. So hungry, so yummy, eat very carefully and do not, I repeat, do not get chocolate on dress!!
3:00PM Bridal party photo fun time! Do as told: stand here, walk there, look over, make silly face, hold the veil, pretend that, help with bride's dress, smile pretty, look serious, pray that your face actually looks like you think it does in your head!
3:47PM Feet tired. Succumb to temptation and remove shoes. Grass feels nice. Note, do not step on ant hill. Sit down and eat some snacks, thank the Groomsmen for bringing food!
3:58PM Someone comes running and says there is a tow truck. Fellow Bridesmaid and Groomsman go running to move the vehicles. Cheer them on while you continue to relax on the lawn. Turns out tow truck is just chilling out. No need to panic.
4:10PM Watch Bride have pictures taken. She is extra beautiful, must be the 'newlywed glow' :) Snap a few of own photos.
4:30PM Stay hydrated! Fellow Bridesmaid, voluntells groomsmen to bring Starbucks. He takes orders and you ask for a PSL Frapp, it's code he doesn't understand. They bring the drinks and all are happy. Yay!
5:00PM Bridal party is released from photo fun time. Time to head to cocktail hour at the hotel.
5:30PM Arrive at hotel and take time in washroom to freshen up. Panic because deodorant is missing. Resign to the fact that you may be a smelly bridesmaid. Decide to touch up makeup, open makeup case and there is deodorant! Confirm to self, sometimes you're too smart for your own good...
5:40PM Mix and mingle at cocktail hour, eat some yummy food, take photos of the deorations, and catch up with friends.
6:25PM Bride and Groom arrive and bridal party gets ready for fabulous entrance.
6:30PM Bride and Groom announced into reception for the first time as Mr. & Mrs. :) Happy Happy Day!
6:35PM MC introduces bridal party. Stand briefly and do the queen wave casually when announced, smile and sit, the show is not about you after all.
6:45PM The head table is served dinner. Eat gracefully, you never know who is watching! Fellow Bridesmaid casually puts spoon on nose. Take picture.
7:48PM Dessert is ready, but the chocolate mousse cake has run out. Linger awkwardly at dessert table with fellow bridesmaid until more is brought out. Take big piece. (To quote Lord of the Rings: "My precious!!")
8:30PM Program begins, MC starts with game for bridal party. Group version of the shoe game. You are given coloured signs and are required to show the pink side (for Bride) or blue side (for Groom) in response to each question. "Who proposed?" pfft that's a no brainer. Blue. "Who farted first?" Easy haha. Pink. "Who would eat the other first in a zombie apocalypse" What?! Lol we have to to answer that!? ....cautiously raise sign...Pink? Look at what other's in the party said, majority is pink. Yup that's your Bride. Everyone laughs, what a fun game :)
8:42PM Beautiful toasts are given by the Maid of Honour and Best Man, plus speeches by the Parents of the Bride and Groom. Just enough laughs, not really any tears, but just sentimental enough. Clink glasses with fellow bridesmaids, To the Bride! Yum, this punch is delicious!! Bride and Groom conclude with their thank you's. What a lovely couple!
9:34PM Bride and Groom cut the cake. Snap lots of photos. They feed cake to eachother, Uh oh! Some cake goes down bride's dress! Bridesmaid duty to run to her rescue? Nope that's the Groom's job now and he's mighty thrilled too ;)
9:42PM Bride and Groom's first dance, so much love.
9:58PM The dance begins! Music is so loud can't hear self think. The strobe lights are so bright and flashy can't see straight. The DJ starts the smog machine...cough, cough, hack. But all of it's okay because at this point one doesn't need to think, see, or breath right?! Dance, dance, dance, and Watch Me Nae Nae!
10:36PM Come and go from dance, yell chat some more with friends above the volume of the music, sit at head table and observe others dance. Fun day, but long day. Have Diet Pepsi for caffeine boost, eeew why is diet Pepsi fountain pop so yucky!
10:43PM Join dance again, dance circle forms...ugh you strongly dislike dance circles. No one goes in center of circle and so man with tie on his head starts pulling people into center one at a time. Eeep! He's going in order around the circle. Leave dance circle before he gets to you. Awkward, potentially embarrassing crisis averted. Phew!
11:10PM Bridesmaids want to Nae Nae again, go over to DJ to request song. Tell DJ song name, he can't hear, say it louder, he still can't hear, yell the song name at the DJ, he says they don't have it. Tell him they already played it once and it was too short. He nods.
11:13PM The next song is the Nae Nae song. You dance your hearts out with your Bride and it is awesome.
11:16PM The DJ plays the Nae Nae again. You keep dancing.
11:19PM The Nae Nae is still playing. The Bride is having a good time and gets Groom to join in. He actually does the 'stanky leg'!
11:22PM Time feels like an eternity now. Is it possible to still be dancing the Nae Nae?
11:25PM The Nae Nae is over and the dance proceeds. You don't think you ever want to Nae Nae again. Why do you keep having to say Nae Nae, you don't even know what it means!
11:48PM Bride and Groom are getting ready to leave. There is no official send off so Bridesmaids form an arch together and cheer them off into their happily ever after.
12:37AM Dance is petering out and so is this Bridesmaid. Duty calls to stay to the end.
1:00AM DJ pulls the plug and the reception is officially over. The mint cleanup crew is up and going, gotta get everything packed up.
1:47AM Dreamland is calling, crawl into bed, another dear friend married off, smile to self, a splendid and successful day for sure.
1:48AM Zzzzzzzz
With love,
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